The Real Kelly Shore


So ecstatic to announce my engagement to you!

I am pleased to share with you a very joyous day in my life. With so many losses this year including the loss of my father, this is an uplifting moment this year in my life. My long term boyfriend has popped the question, and I said “Yes”! It’s a lot of girls dream to get that day when their special someone will pop the question, but even a more rare occasion and  dream to find a man who will stand beside you in life with everything. When you are in love it’s easy to take many things for granted, but I never took him for granted or what he is risking professionally and personally in his personal life. I wanted the decision to be purely his and not based on my needs and desires. I value this man with all with in me, he is my friend, my confidant, and he is all that I ever wanted in a man. It’s so rare to find a guy your age and have a sense of normalcy with out society breathing down your neck. I feel very blessed to have found such an individual.


I am sure many have heard the rumors and untrue statements made, but the true story is we are couple who love and respect one another. I am sure the rumors will keep going and the battle is not done. Let me enlighten you. As a couple we understand when one is down or one needs space. With true love comes understanding and a commitment to your love.  People aren’t perfect and love isn’t perfect, but being there is what matters. He has made mistakes and I have made mistakes along the way as any normal couple. We will only grow stronger as time goes on. That is my guarantee to you!

I want to thank my true fans’ who stuck by me in this time away from the camera, my return, and my relationship. To the fans’ who still believe I am a down to earth, sweet girl who is just looking for her way in the world. Who knew porn was my outlet to get surgeries to enhance my looks to match how I felt on the inside. Sometimes I felt so hopeless and lonely during this short career  I have had. Who knew this is the road I’d be taking. It has finally become a reality for me, and I still haven’t quite gotten over the shock when this amazing man got on his hands and knees and looked directly in my eye and said the words I never thought I’d hear. The words of acceptance, the words of love, and the words of becoming one. It’s such a surreal feeling to have this opportunity. It’s funny how life directs you in directions which surprise you.

Right now I am in a good place. I feel strong once again, with the void of my father and mother, this helps empower me and make me realize even more how lucky I was to have such great parents and how this would make them proud as well. I feel mature, whole, and ready to take on the world with my loving man in my corner. I feel I can do anything. I am ready to start living! I can finally let go of silly things, and know what I feel inside about myself and about him is all that truly ever matters. Talk as you must, but your fears will go unfounded.


Where do I go from here? I go on living, many probably have noticed I haven’t done a hardcore scene in over a year and never plan on doing one again. My life is taking me back to me, and some may say it’s a selfish venture, but you only live once. Some only find great love once and I am taking it. I make no apologies for it. I thank you for your support, your well wishes, and all the encouragement you have given me. After the AVN’s this year it will be my last step in the adult industry! I will miss you all dearly, and I hope you understand where I am coming from. My fans, my friends I have made, and the opportunities porn has given me in enhancements  I shall never forget.



With all my love,


Kelly

Posted by Kelly Shore in Personal and tagged with , , , , ,

Can’t make you love me

I can make you smile 
I can make you cry 
I can make you stronger 
I can kiss you 
I can hug you 
But one thing I could never 
Do is make you love me. 
Drop, drop, drop 
My tears fall, out of all the things 
I can’t do what’s important the most. 
You just don’t love me 
And it happens I love you- 
So what is the answer 
To this mystery puzzle? 
I guess it is quite easy 
Feelings cannot be forced 
Chemistry didn’t happen 
And I just have to fall, 
Fall on my knees… 
Bruises do hurt 
Reality is harsh, but life is so 
I can sit here, asking 
Constant questions of why 
Why I can do all the things… but one 
But I would only be wasting my time 
As the truth stands- 
I just can’t make you love me 
So I am the fool… 
I’m loving a boy 
Who doesn’t even think about me 
Once in a blue. 
So why am I here, writing again?! 
I can’t believe I’ve gotten myself 
So far in the mess, 
Yes, my feelings are messy 
You’ve torn them apart 
With your playful ways 
You fooled my silly heart.

Posted by Kelly Shore in Uncategorized

My Wish…..

Stop Oppression. We can do it if we just be ourselves with out word slinging and violence. Why is it we transpeople feel we need to talk back to a group of guys that clocked us in public. Why do we need to escalate it so its another transsexuals’ death in vain. A beautiful individual working her/his way down the path of peace within her/his self. The peace they will never be allowed over an escalated argument or dating a man or woman under false pretenses. I’ll go more into this topic later.
It’s a minute out of our day that we were name called, but we have 23:59 to keep on our path and the rest of our lives. I say lets bury our pride and worry about ourselves and safety first. Too many transsexual deaths’ come from escalating the issue of hate. We think standing up and yelling back at the person/persons emotionally abruising us is going to make them change their mind or change what was said that made us so mad. I can tell you it wont. I have always believed you can always catch more bees with honey. When we decide to take part in the wordslinging it escalates the hate more. it gives them the catalyst to make it easier to physically harm us. Who knows if that day it will be a beating or death. Why play with fire people?

I don’t get why we give these people filled with hate so much power over our lives? We should worry more about what we think of ourselves and what our loved ones think, before instigating a mob of haters. So they called us a fag, a man, a freak, a pervert, or whatever lame attempt they can throw at us let them have it. In the end we know who we are and what path we are on. Let the them have their view, if thats what it takes to keep us safe for another day. We still have our view, they haven’t taken it from us. The media may strip us as they like, but we know who we are and thats what is important. Hold dear to things in you life you value and love. Remember that tomorrow we most likely wont even remember the incident the day before. This keeps us safe and gives us the time we need to achieve our genders we need to be viewed as, live as, and love as. Escalating hate with flinging words can result in having our  life ripped away from us. Remember time is precious, life is precious, and lying on a morgue table is not a wish I have for myself. My wish is to get these men and women that have beat us and murdered us not have the option of a slap on the wrist with a thing called a sanity plea. That judicial systems finally start seeing these crimes as hate crimes, and giving them the full punishment of the law. We need to stop giving these people the angle they need to be set free for our deaths. 

Lastly with ladies and gentleman that go around tricking men and women on dates. I beg you to think of your actions before you keep practicing this habit. I realize you need to be treated as your gender, and maybe you think in your head you can’t be treated solely as that gender if they know. I assure you this isn’t true! Lets remember our dead. Lets remember the beautiful teen Gwen Araujo who played with fire and in the end was burnt. No she did not deserve this, she was a teen girl wanting to do what every teen girl does her age. It would be great if we had the luxury of living as any other teen girl, but we as transwomen have limitations we need to understand this and embrace this. To protect ourselves. To stop our murders. Lets stop giving these people filled with so much hate an excuse to dismiss who we are so easily by killing us. I am sure I’ll get many debaters on this, saying this is cowardly, but dear it’s smart. Why throw away your life so easily? Why do you feel the need to give these people who you only knew for that instant so much power on who we are? This issue goes on a lot with transmen also tricking women, violence is less in these instances, but please remember Brandon. Another young transperson wanting to be viewed as what he was. A man. He wanted to fall in love like everyone does, but loving under false pretenses under any admission will never work out. There are those rare and lucky cases where tricking did turn out good for the transmen and women, but don’t base these rare chances on fact or your fate.

Lets talk about what we should do. Lets ignore the people that don’t understand us on the streets, and put our anger towards getting our voices heard politically, by openminded supporters, and by each other. Lets stop hating on one another and focus this energy on getting transwomen and men jobs, opportunities, and equal rights. Lets try to figure out a plan to make sex work less of a stigma of what transsexuals are and do. Let transwomen and men that have the means open businesses and hire other transpeople. Many are doing this now, lets stick to doing this. Lets work on helping our weak and making them strong, instead of focusing on the people who would rather see us dead. Lets donate money to activist groups who are fighting for our rights in Washington, in our counties, and in our cities. My wish is to become  a more unified, caring, and helping community. Rather than a community that reads one another, because one girl is less transitioned than the next. My wish is the lover of transwomen and men stand with us to battle discrimination and oppression. That they will be proud to say I love transsexuals for whatever their reasoning. My wish is to see less transsexuals having money for sex and more mainstream jobs. Even if it’s just stripping. My wish is to bring our sisterhood and brotherhood together instead of transmen being on one side and transwomen on the other. Lets stop oppression now. Lets use our voices to uplift, instead of defending all the time. Most of all lets stop our murders, thats my wish.

I would love to see trans-couples come forward to talk about their successes. Their love. Their normalcy. To help educate. I know there are many couples out there but so little come out and talk, all you hear is about escorts. We need to make a stand with empowerment and education, not with idle words and comebacks. It leaves us nowhere!
XoXo

Kelly

Posted by Kelly Shore in Personal

I Will Love Again!

Did I ever tell you how you live in me
Every waking moment, even in my dreams
And if all this talk is crazy
And you don’t know what I mean
Does it really matter
Just as long as I believe

I will love again
Though my heart is breaking, I will
love again
Stronger than before
I will love again
Even if it takes a lifetime to get over you
Heaven only knows, I will love again

People never tell you
The way they truly feel
I would die for you gladly
If I knew it was for real
So if all this talk sounds crazy
And the words don’t come out right
Does it really matter
If it gets me through this night

If I’m true to myself, nobody else can take the place of you
But I’ve got to move on, tell me what else can I do

I will love again
One day I know, I will love again
You can’t stop me from loving again, breathing again
Feeling again
I know, one day, I’ll love again

Posted by Kelly Shore in Personal and tagged with , , ,

Like We Never Loved At All:

I will continue my mini – biography on Monday :)

You never looked so good
As you did last night
Underneath the city lights
There walking with your friend
Laughing at the moon
I swear you looked right through me
But I’m still living with your goodbye
And you’re just going on with your life

How can you just walk on by
Without one tear in your eye?
Don’t you have the slightest feelings left for me?
Maybe that’s just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all

You, I hear you’re doing fine
Seems like you’re doing well
As far as I can tell
Time is leaving us behind
Another week has passed
And still I haven’t laughed yet
So tell me what your secret is?
To letting go, letting go like you did

Did you forget the magic?
Did you forget the passion?
Did you ever miss me
Ever long to kiss me?

Maybe that’s just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all

You, you never looked so good

Posted by Kelly Shore in Uncategorized and tagged with , , , , ,

The Story of Kelly Shore Part 1 (The Early Years)

This is a more personal blog…one away from my porn site. One I can post poems..life issues…a diary if you will. A biography of my lifestory..for fans to get  to know me better and where I came from.  I thank Bella Bellucci for getting this started for me. I thank my thoughts for the words I type out to you. I plan on being as honest and candid with you in this blog as possible. Where my life takes me you will follow along! I thank my fans every day for making me into the beautiful woman I have became today. I thank my family and friends for always supporting me through good times and bad. I thank my momma for giving me the gift of caring and forgiveness. Through her she made me realize what love truly is, its unconditional support and taking action in that person’s life no matter what.

I want to start my blog by talking about who I am and where I came from. I grew up in New Orleans, Louisiana to Grace and Donald Shore, with many older siblings. I come from a loving, passionate family. I grew up in a big house on the outskirts of the city, near my family. My closest niece to my age was Amanda. We were the best of friends starting out. Did everything together, sang, danced, hung out. Come to think of  it most of my friends were females. I actually never realized I wasn’t well a ‘girl’ till I was age five and put in the same bathtub as my niece. I noticed we had something different. I think then my troubles of fighting who I was supposed to be started. I tried on all my moms clothes, always wanted to play the wife/girl in childhood games, and would throw tantrums if they bought me any boy toys. I was definitely a handful as a child. I was always very feminine. I remember going to high school football games singing Madonna and Whitney Houston. Declaring after watching Flashdance that I wanted to be just like her. I never really looked at males as role models.

(more…)

Posted by Kelly Shore in Personal and tagged with , , ,